Recipe for Roasted Sloth

Take a fair selection of youth, just enough to make it look tasty. Season with a handful of elder sloths.

Bowl your best 4 opening bowlers keeping the run rate to under 5 an over.

Bring on triple-wicket-maiden James Mc-Ringer-Williams to remove any opening batsmen.

Match should now be golden, and you may, mistakingly, think it done and dusted.

To properly roast the sloth marinade, for a couple of overs in self-smugness and over confidence before revealing your openers were in fact, lower order batsman.

Thrash intently for 10 – 15 overs before repeating process with your bowlers, starting with the pie chuckers and ending with your speed bowlers.

For optimum flavour and taint of offal, ensure said speed bowlers come on in the fading light.

Well done to Spam and Bubba, the latter discovering he can play himself in taking 6 balls to score and a further 16 to retire, the former doing so in 33 balls but like it says on the can “Fresh Meat – gone stale”….