A week without rain meant the KES strip was flat and firm for yesterday’s home fixture with old adversaries Hampset. The outfield was similarly dry and, correspondingly, fast. So, would a score of 141 be sufficient to enforce a second Sloth win?

The already familiar combination of Painter and Notley set the tone, always looking to hit to the boundary but this time also keen to run whenever possible. Painter, now reassured his back can withstand the stresses of swinging the bat, did so with abandon, retiring once again in short order. Notley tried to emulate this but was perhaps a little over keen, falling – after playing the quicker stuff with good soft hands – to a straight delivery. Similarly, Hewes’s innings was short-lived; his removal ushering-in the enticing prospect of Bonds senior and junior at the crease together.

It was interesting to observe the familial snubbing of foot movement in favour of hefty brute force. In this case, it was junior who had the edge, in terms of hitting boundaries to both sides of the wicket. However, both had the edge in finding the edge, squeezing improbable runs from near-dismissals but remaining unperturbed. Cam blasted on, retiring undefeated, to make way for chief-irritant Freshmeat.

Johnny was tested by some intermittently threatening bowling but, as ever, ensured the scoreboard wasn’t allowed to idle. Looking pretty much invincible these days, Fresh drove, cut and steered the ball through every chink in the Hampset defence. It was similarly good to see the return of another familiar face in the shape of Matt Cawley. Taking a couple of balls to settle, Cawley remained watchful and composed; displaying terrific hand-eye coordination and great instinct for punishing the bad ball.

Headon, once again, looked as though he could – at any moment – break loose and clatter everything for six but, perhaps aware that few balls remained, didn’t quite find his rhythm. He did, however, have the good sense to run the final delivery, in spite of the fact the ball remained at facing-batsman Reynolds(?)’ feet. Sadly, Matt H. had not taken the trouble to let Matt R. know – and he (R) was left stranded as the inevitable run-out was administered.

Having seen an insurmountable target of 159 – um – surmounted just two weeks previously, Sloths were not complacent as they took up their fielding positions. Fortunately, in Fresh, they had a captain who actually understands fielding positions. Plus some pretty tidy bowlers.

Heedon, now finding the rhythm that had eluded him with the bat, quickly established that run-scoring was not going to be a simple matter for Hampset’s openers. Then Bond junior bamboozled from the other end, producing sufficient flight to ensure that batsmen looking to hit on the full mis-timed and procured a succession of deftly-held catches (notably from Hewes and Dally-Smith). Painter, meanwhile, took a more direct approach, hitting the stumps 3 times in one over, the first of which cut-back exquisitely from the dry turf.

One or two of Hampset’s middle order did manage to scatter the fielders to the boundary, lofting fours and sixes that always promised the potential for more catches. However, captain Fresh never allowed his men to languish in the deep and maintained the pressure throughout. Hewes was generous in tempering his pace for the tale-enders but nonetheless removed two of their wickets.

Leaving Reynolds to deliver the final blow, bowling Hampset’s last man round the legs, which is always satisfying for the bowler – less so for the man dismissed.

And that was that. Another win. And well-deserved, too. Not especially funny. Not even particularly interesting, really. But satisfying all the same.
Can Sloths maintain this winning form? Will KES ever re-stock the bar? Will Notley move into the parish? What will Cawley do to fill the summer’s Glastonbury-free void? And… where was Ed?

Horatio Hornblower; nautical correspondent; Slothful Times